Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Betsy Blanchard is sick of Facebook statuses.

When you get right down to it, just about any given facebook status could fit into one or more of the following ten categories:

1. "Please-pity-me-cuz-my-life-sucks"






Don't get me wrong, I actually pity these people. The first for not realizing how much this status annoys me (and the other 346 people who unknowingly fell upon it) and the second because tuna fish is sick-nasty.

2. "Hi,-I'm-Boring-McBoringson,-how-are-you?"



I wasted 3/4 of a second of my life reading this. Thank you.

3. "I'm-under-the-impression-people-actually-want-to-know-what-I'm-doing"
...we don't.

4. "Inside-jokes-make-me-seem-cooler-than-I-am"



I'm not sure I have words for this.

5. "Pissing-you-off-is-my-specialty"
I love bashing people too!

6. "Music-lyrics-make-me-mysterious"
Don't worry, I don't know what you're trying to say to your ex-boyfriend who apparently broke up with you for another girl last week. It's your little secret. ;)

7. "Offer-me-some-congratulations-&/or-compliments-please"
Congrats.

8. "The-drunker-it-sounds-like-I'm-going-to-get,- the-more-people-will-like-me"
...

9. "Insightful-quotes-'R-us"



These are hit and miss for me. I know a lot of people who can pull these off; for example, the one above came from a good friend of mine. His statuses always interest me. Now for the twelve of you constantly reminding me to "never give up," thank you. Ever the insightful one.

10. I-love-[insert.something.here]"
I don't care unless you're going to talk about Shia LaBeouf. In which case, I will fight you.

3 comments:

David said...

Betsy,

You just made my night. Thank you for posting this, because quite frankly, I am sick of seeing statuses that people are obviously posting for attention. Many people just don't understand that others don't really give a crap about the trivial matters of their lives.

For example, I have a certain family member who can't seem to brush her teeth or even relieve herself without facebooking it for all to see. And then of course, we have to hear about how she buys her daughter alcohol or the endless disgusting aspects of her love life.

I do just want to say that I am a fan of posting song lyrics, however. Sometimes, I just hear a really good song and want to share it with the world to counteract much of the horrible music that is played these days.

Finally, I just want to say that your whole blog is awesome. After reading yours, I'm really starting to wish I had the will power to force myself to keep up a blog of my own. Keep the brilliant insights into life coming, I'll be reading! Oh and come to Screaming Glory's show on March 14 dude!

Allison said...

Betsssss,
Check out www.lamebook.com, you'll love it ;)

Betsy said...

David,

I won't even deny that I post song lyrics too :) hehe and yes of course I will be there!!!